Sexual Intimacy

Bill and Janna’s sex life was non-existent. They had been married for ten years and during that time, physical intimacy became less and less of a priority for her. Bill got tired of asking for sex, and eventually started sleeping in the guest bedroom because it was easier. After the kids were born, her body changed, household responsibilities, homework and extracurricular activities were all consuming, and Janna decided that she had no time and saw no need to address her reluctance to engage in physical intimacy with Bill. Soon Bill started going to websites where he could look at attractive women and at least satisfy his visual needs. Then it got worse. This couple has major challenges with sexual intimacy.

A sexless marriage, according to experts is one where the couple has sex ten times a year or less. Studies show that more than twenty percent of couples in America, fall into this group, and this includes Christian couples. Men and women are different, especially when it comes to sexual needs and expectations. Regrettably, many husbands and wives do not consider these differences nor seek to understand how they can be more successful in the bedroom. The Bible gives clear instructions about making sex a priority in marriage and cautions husbands and wives not to abstain from sex, only in extenuating circumstances. When a marriage loses its passion, it could be headed for disaster.

In my practice, I begin by dealing with the underlying issues that affect intimacy. Once husband and wife are able to understand and work through these challenges, their sexual relationship becomes easier to address. I also help the couple articulate their wants and needs in the bedroom and encourage ongoing communication in this area.